Giving thanks
From Jay:
Thanksgiving is so very different this year. I usually give thanks for what I have — a wonderful family and friends, a comfortable and warm home, good food and nourishment — and also for hopes and dreams — a world where connection is valued over separation and peace is possible. I always remember that any of these things can be lost at any time.
This year, though, it’s harder to be happy in giving thanks. How to say “thank you” for what is gone? How to fill the void left by the support that you no longer provide to a parent who is no longer here? I know Mom was ready, and that her passing was the most beautiful, peaceful experience I could have imagined. But she’s not here, and I’m not feeling the Happy part of Happy Thanksgiving.
At least I wasn’t, until I reread all the stories and condolences you’ve sent these past days. I’ve learned about more about Mom’s life than I’d known and, even though her body is gone, her spirit is actually growing larger for me. Just this morning, two people who have siblings from Mom’s last brood, and who’d never met, made a new connection.
I’m looking forward to planning a celebration of Mom’s life in the spring, so that family, friends, and canines can meet, many of us for the first time. We’re considering a place in the hills above Richmond, with a view of the mountains that come as close to Tibet as we have in Vermont.
So, I’m not going to wish you only a Happy Thanksgiving, because I’m learning giving thanks is not always a “happy” experience. But, from loss comes renewal, so I’m just going to Give Thanks for you … and for the past as well as our present and our future.
